OneWordx12: Are you in?

It's almost here.

2021

So many people seem to be holding on to BIG hopes for the new year. 

I, personally, have always felt that New Year's Eve (much like prom and other big party-type events) are never as great as the build up. It's almost like the preparations hold all the fun and then actual event never lives up to the hype. I suspect this new year will be much the same. Call me a pessimist (I've never been called one before but there's not time like the present) but I can't imagine waking up on January 1st, 2021 feeling all that different than most of 2020.

We will still be in a pandemic. We will still be in a lockdown. We will still be watching the cases counts go up and the vaccination roll out being bungled.

But we can control how we react to our current reality.

After choosing to try out the One Word style resolution (is it a resolution??) for a few years, I wanted something different last year. I decided on trying to do one word each month for all 12 months. 

As Doug Peterson as mentioned a few times when my blogs were highlighted on This Week In Ontario EduBlogs I might be a genius! LOL! I can assure you that I am not. What I am is naturally reflective and I always found that my one word faded into the background and it didn't really fit a few months into the year.

This past year, my OneWordx12 was always in the back of my mind. I was constantly thinking about what my word might be and why it would fit. It took my natural reflections and ramped it up a notch. 

I am very much looking forward to completing OneWordx12 again this year. In 2020, I choose 13 words and wrote 11 blog posts. Most months my words were chosen last into the month and a few times I had them ready on the first. I do know what my word will be for January 2021 (at least I know right now! As I learning in 2020 my word can change multiple times in any given month and to be honest, I liked that part, too.). 

I'd love for others to join me this year. 

What words might you pick to reflect on your journey through 2021? How might picking 12 words help keep you focusing on moving forward with any goals you have and learning from your past experiences?

Here is a list of my 2020 words from OneWordx12 and each month is linked to the blog post (should you care to go back and see why I picked each word for the month. If you do join me and are one Twitter please use #OneWordx12 to help connect with others who are joining. It will be interesting to see and learn from the OneWordx12 choices of others. 

January- Renew

February- Motion

March- Appreciate

April- Breathe

May- Grace

June- Unlearn

July- Forward

August- Conscious

September-Connection

October- Impact/Moments

November- Wellness

December- Journey

The Value Of

 

This year has brought a lot to our doorsteps and into our homes. 

The uncertainty and strain of job action and strike days. The constant attacks from the provincial government on the education system. 

The pandemic. 

The shift to emergency distance learning. The lockdown. The reopening plan that wasn't.

Increasing cases numbers. Increasing death rates. Multiple re-organization of classes and school assignments. The daily press conferences. Masks. 

Hand sanitizer. And so much more...

But I also think the year has brought some clarity. At least it has for me. 

I started the year by deciding to choose a new word each month instead a word for the whole year. 

What a year to pick.

I really enjoyed having the opportunity to reflect forward each month 

and be responsive to how I was feeling, the goals I wanted to achieve 

and the emotions I was having. 

I will be doing OneWordx12 again in 2021 

and I'd like to invite you to join me. 

In looking back over my blog posts and the words I picked 

I wanted to end the year focusing on the good things that 2020 brought into my life. 

I am an optimist by nature and usually look for the good in most situations. 

So what has this past year taught me?

The value of a hug. 

I am hugger. I hug my kids and my family a lot. I still hold hands with my mom when we go places together. I usually see my parents once a month (which doesn't sound like a lot until you know that we live 3.5 hours apart). I call my mom almost every day. Keeping distanced from my parents has been one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I've watched my children struggle because they miss Papa and Gram and talking through a screen is just not good enough. We are some of the lucky ones, though. COVID hasn't affected our family personally at this point but as I hugged my parents in a rest stop parking lot yesterday (while wearing a face shield and mask) I was struck by how important hugs are.

A hug says hello. A hug says goodbye. I missed you. I love you. You are important to me. I can't wait to see you again. I'm never letting go. I love you. I will never take the opportunity to hug people for granted again.

The value of a partner. 

A lot of people joked about being in lockdown with their partner. Driving each other up the wall. Never having space of their own. Small little habits that grate on their nerves. Being home with my husband from March until September when I returned to working in my school is by far the most amount of time I have ever spent with the man I married 13 years ago. I mean, we were in school and then had jobs for our entire relationship. The most time we'd ever spent together before this was our two week vacation to Disney with the girls in 2017. It's something to really think about- we marry people or commit to long term relationships with people we really only see on the weekends and for fleeting hours during the work week. The pandemic and the lockdown really showed me how much I have come to depend and rely on my husband. As my mom always says about my dad, "I'm not trading him for anything."

The value of a network.

As you get older and life gets busier and kids are thrown into the mix your friendships and networks shift. You only have so much time in the day. I am so grateful for the network that I have cultivated has an adult. Say what you will about social media but for many of us it was a lifeline this year. Being able to connect with friends and family at a distance through technology was necessary and vital. I'm thankful for friends who checked in on us. I'm thankful for #eduknitnight and the crafters I share my Tuesday nights with each week. I'm thankful for podcasting and the opportunity to speak with other people and learn their story. I'm thankful for Twitter and meeting educators who value the same things I do. 

The value of knowing your passion. 

I've written many times on this blog about my role as a teacher-librarian. I wrote in the spring that I wasn't sure I was still a librarian if I wasn't in the library. I wrote in the fall about whether I was still a teacher since I rarely see students these days. This year has taught me how much I love being an educator... in a role that gets to work with students. I have long been advised by many people what I should think about moving into admin, or a resource, or or or. I have long said it's not my path. I value the importance of good admin and resource roles. They are needed to drive change in a school. For me though, those role are too far away from students. I became a teacher because I love kids. Being a teacher-librarian, while I no longer have "my own" students I do get to interact with many, many students. I miss that more than I can explain. This year has taught me that being a teacher-librarian is the farthest role away from students that I want to have. 

The new year will be here in a few days. 2021. What will it bring?

The Journey Continues

 I have written this blog post a dozen times in my head already.

I'd say that's why I'm not writing my December OneWordx12 post until Dec 12th but upon looking back at the the last few months it would appear that most of my one word posts have been published this late into the month. I wonder if that's because it's 2020 and everything seems to be just a little bit harder (and somethings so very much harder) or the nature of trying to choose one word to represent an entire month 12 times through the year?

As this is my first time doing OneWordx12, I don't really have an answer.

I know that picking this word has been an uphill battle. Not in a bad way but due to the fact that I couldn't seem to settle on one word and the circumstances and emotions around the word kept changing.

The first word I wanted to pick was teacher.

The word teacher is such a big word. And it means so many things to so many people. In a recent conversation Chris Cluff posed a question about the idea of "if you take the idea of being a teacher out of your identity, who are you?" and it really stuck with me.

During the lock down last spring I wrote this blog about being (or not) a teacher-librarian  and I had been feeling similar feelings about my current role except now looking at the "teacher" part of the equation.

Many people have asked how this year is going and how I feel and for a lot of the time I answered that I no longer felt like a teacher. 

An instructional coach? Yes. A curator? Yes. A book deliverer? Yes. A storytime reader? Yes. But a teacher? No.

My access to working with students between September and now has been very limited. And I fully recognize that most educators are barely keeping their heads above water these days so inviting another educator into their space (virtual or otherwise) to co-plan and co-teach is an added layer that they can't handle. So I read a lot of books to a lot of classes. I asked some questions and discussed some ideas.

But was it teaching? I don't know. It didn't feel like it.

But then it was almost as if a light switch was turned on and all of a sudden people were looking for me to join them to teach. Perhaps they were feeling like they had a handle on this year a little more. Perhaps it was that they wanted to explore coding and had very little experience of their own. Whatever the reason, the word teacher didn't seem to quite fit in the same way for December. I had been hoping that by choosing it I would focus on the ways in which I was still teaching, even if it was small or with adults, but the sentiment didn't seem as necessary anymore.

The second word I wanted to pick was decenter.

As it always seems with December (and for the most part November) we are slapped in the face with Christmas as soon as Halloween is over. I am a big believer that all things Christmas should wait until at least November 12th in order to give space to Remembrance Day. This year it seems many people who celebrate Christmas needed the cheer and sparkle a little earlier than usual this year and started putting up their trees and decorations sooner than normal. We put ours up on American Thanksgiving which is a about a week early for us. And I get that desire.... at home. 

I understand why people might be feeling the need for more cheer and sparkle this year but as always, I struggle with the amount of Christmas that is brought into the schools.

Every activity in December doesn't need to have an element of Christmas in it. There's no need for reindeer math or Santa letters (That's a whole other blog post...). And there shouldn't be a tree or an elf on the shelf in any classroom. In my opinion.

While I hear people's reasoning that it's not the religious aspects of Christmas and that many of the children like it, I wonder what message we are sending when our classrooms continue to mimic the dominant culture of the wider society. Do these same educators who put up Christmas tree and center so many of their activities in December around Christmas do the same for every other holiday? Do they also do menorah math and dreidel writing prompts? Do they find a way to ensure that Diwali and Eid are the centre of all the activities in their classroom during the months in which they fall?

I think if we are devoted to being anti-racist educators who decolonize our teaching, our bookshelves, our assessments then we also need to be prepared to take a hard look at Christmas as ask how we can decenter it in our schools. 

So why didn't I pick decenter as my December word? 

Well, I think it goes back to my first choice in words- teacher.

I'm not with students all the time. I'm not creating a community classroom space for these discussions. I don't feel as those I have the leverage in which to enact direct change. I can discuss the ideas with my colleagues (I have). I can add ideas and link articles in my library weekly update (I have). I can join in with Twitter threads and post my thoughts (I have). 

But if I'm not a teacher in a classroom space can I actually create meaningful change? 

I don't know. 

I don't know how much or even if many of my colleagues are reading my library weekly updates. I don't know if they are looking at the articles I am linking and taking the time to reflect on their practice. I don't know if they are seeing it as another add-on and skimming past. I don't know. 

And so upon reflection it felt like journey would be a better word for the last month of 2020. Because what a journey this year has been. And what a journey we are still in. 

The pandemic is nowhere near over. The journey of dealing with that and the far-reaching affects on the education system will be something we are dealing with for many years to come. The cultural reckoning that has taken place this year as people grapple with ideas about white supremacy and being antiracist need to continue to be pushed to the forefront of our consciousness and confronted every day in all spaces. 

By choosing the word journey I can continue to reflect on both my roles as a teacher and as a librarian and how I use those roles to push forward the need to decenter the dominant culture in our school spaces.

 

Wellness- Time to Set Priorities

This month's word is WELLNESS.

As the end of 2020 approaches and yet we are just starting the school year, it has become clear to me that I need to shake off the pandemic feelings of worry and doom (as much as possible, when it's possible) and focus on me.

A week or so ago I went to bed with a sore throat and woke up with the same sore throat which meant I didn't pass the COVID self-assessment and couldn't go into work. I stayed home for the day and rested.

But I also still answered emails, worked on a choice board for the staff at school for an upcoming event, had a virtual meeting, and, and , and....

Then I slept for 11+ hours that night. 

Like many (ALL) educators out there this year I am burning the candle at both ends. Trying to cram everything in and still always feeling like there's more to do.

There's never enough time.

There will always be more to do.

So I decided that some things needed to change to better center myself, my health and my family.

I am trying to wake up most days around 5:30 to do yoga or another workout.

I am focusing on the amount of water I drink in a day.

I am finding spare moments to move and get my step count up, including walking laps on my morning duty since so few cars come to the Kiss n' Ride this year. Going for laps around the school after long stretches on the computer. Finding the time to take the dog for a longer walk in the morning and evening.

I am locking the social media apps on my phone every evening to focus on being present with my family.

I am spending more time reading books (I know that one seems strange... I already read so much!! But I am actively making sure I read for longer stretches each day.)

I am letting go of other things- like webinars and screen events. There's so much good stuff happening all the time but I constantly feel like I am checking my calendar to remember what comes next, what else I'm supposed to be logging in to see, etc. I need more free time and less programmed time. 

In some ways it's hard to believe that I am already at my 11th word of the year!

Where has the time gone? Will 2020 ever end?

I will say that I have really enjoyed picking a new word each month and highly recommend for others to consider trying it as we head into 2021. 

 

Impact/Moments

  I had my onewordx12 chosen for October.

I had it picked. I was ready.

Then I listened to Season 4 Episode 3 of Rolland Chidiac's and Chris Cluff's DeCodEd podcast. 

So many good gems. So much #thoughtfuel.

My original plan was to have my one word for October be impact as a follow up to 

September's one word which was connection. The return to school has been so different than any other year and I knew that having the library space closed to the students and

 educators would require an extra effort to build and maintain relationships. 

I have tried over the course of the first few weeks of the school year to reach out to all the educators, both in face-to-face and online school, at my school to find ways to support them and their learners.  

I wanted to keep moving forward with this idea and focus on how the programming from the library might be able to impact the learning of others and their journey. It's such a different experience being alone in the library all day compared the last three years where we have worked to create space that is open and available to all learners during the day. 

At the start of October I had a few days of feeling a little sorry for myself. 

I miss seeing kids and working with them on their learning on a regular basis. 

I love being able to do read alouds with classes and chatting about the books but it's not the same.

I know there are other educators feeling the same way that are in much tougher positions than me.

I am very privileged to be in my library role and to have to opportunity to be a support for the educators and learners in my school. I know I don't have to deal with the ups and downs of tech issues, reaching students who aren't engaged in this "new normal" of school. I know I don't need to worry about being in a cramped classroom without adequate distancing and trying to reimagine learning when so much of what educators are being asked to do goes against their knowledge of best practices and good pedagogy. I know I am fortunate that I was not reallocated from my library role. I know I am fortunate that I didn't have to wait to find out my assignment for the year and then still only have a few days in which to plan.

But I sometimes wonder if I should have volunteered to teach an online class and 

spend my day exploring and learning with a group of children.

All of this was swirling through my brain as September ended and October began. 

I could see how impact would be a good focus for the month.

How might I use my role in the library to 

impact the learning of others?

How might I be able to support educators and learners 

as they reimagined their own learning spaces 

and began to explore inquiries in this school year?

How might I begin to curate a rich collection of texts, 

both physically and virtually, to have an impact 

on the learning of our school community?  

And then I listened to Rolland and Chris' podcast over the course of two days as I drove to work. 

Perhaps a focus on moments would better serve me this month?

How can we seek out those moments of impact in our day to celebrate the 

connections we are making with learners?

How might we dive deep into those moments of doubt and create lasting impact from our learning?

What can I learn from my moments of sadness and loss? Because there is a lot of loss still to be processed about this school year and the end of the school year in the spring. How might that help be to become a better educator for my students and community?

And so I am choosing two words-

Impact.

Moments.

At this time, I see myself keeping these words through November and checking in with myself. 

What impact do I see my role in the library having on the education of those 

working and learning in my school community?

What moments will I embrace and use to drive learning forward?

How might I use these reflections to create more moments of impact?

A Dichotomy of Words

 Dichotomy.

This is the definition that appears on Google when you put dichotomy into the search bar. 

While I have loved this word for a long time, there isn't always much call to use it in daily life. Especially when you are teaching children who are all under ten years of age. Lately though, it's been an idea that has been bouncing around my head for some time. As "back to school" drew nearer (it never really felt like we left) and the talk of #SafeSeptember, #UnSafeSeptember, "the best plan", #NotMyPlan swirled around us and everything about education seemed to be a dicohotomy. 

Masks or no masks?

Physically distanced students or collapsed classes?

1m vs 2m?

Online learning or face-to-face?

Hand sanitizer or soap and water?

Google Classroom or Brightspace?

Also rattling around my head has been ideas about "ways of knowing". I read this blog post by Melanie White and it really stuck with me. If the pivot to emergency distance learning has taught us anything, I hope it is the importance of paying attention to multiple ways of knowing which at times can present a conflict of ideas.

A dichotomy of knowing. 

The idea of the loss of presence discussed by Melanie is huge. So much of teaching and learning is in the connection and presence of people being together. Now, I don't think that you can't build real relationships and engage students through remote learning. It's definitely possible as I've "met" many educators through Twitter and other digital platforms and feel as close to them as I do people I see face to face, and in some cases closer. But it comes back to ways of knowing. 

How might educators embrace the knowledge that stems from students' home life and culture as they build relationships in a virtual learning environment?

How might we open our teaching and own learning to the varied ways of knowing that our students bring to the learning environment, both face-to-face and virtually?

How might embracing a dichotomy of knowing help everyone's learning journey move forward?

It's interesting to me that Melanie's post stemmed from a conversation with Chris Cluff because if I remember correctly he tagged me in a Twitter post and drew my attention to Melanie's blog. He and I had also been chatting back and forth about the dichotomy of being supported and being supportive in our current educational situation.

I have been struggling with the balance of helping, supporting, listening and generally being open to taking in the pain and worries of others and helping them to feel more at ease in the unknowns of our educational climate (well as at ease as anyone can feel these days) and the idea of taking on too much from others. I've seen and heard the analogy of the airplane mask more than one time in recent weeks- you always put your mask on first, and then help others. It goes back to the idea that you can't pour from an empty cup.

How can we support each other as educators without depleting our own reserves?

Being kept in my role as a 1.0 teacher-librarian is a huge privilege that I do not take lightly. When so many other boards across Ontario have shuttered their school libraries and reassigned school library professionals I know I am one of the lucky ones. As I returned to the physical library space this past week, I began to put things back together and re-imagine what the library could be moving forward. And as many of you know, this re-imagining actually started weeks ago as I created a visual representation and document outlining the possible role of the school-library during this school year. 

Without the contact and connection of students in the school library how will I build meaningful connections to students? How can I support educators and build relevant library programming without educators feeling like I am adding to their already overflowing plate? 

As Chris and I spoke the idea emerged of how educators are usually focused on 'the who and the what" as they approach the start of school. What grade am I teaching? What subjects will I be planning for? What does the curriculum contain? Who are my students? Who might need extra support this year? Who will need to be challenged?

And while all those questions still exist and are still valid, the unknowing of who and what for many teachers as disrupted their usual routine of prepping for back to school. Many educators still don't know what grade they will be teaching. Many still don't know what subjects they will be responsible for. Many still don't know who will be in their classes.

And so we shift. 

As he always does, Chris laid out the thought fuel- we focus on the why and the how. 

Why do we teach children? Why do we love this job? How will we engage our students in learning? How will be show that we value and respect the knowledge and ways of knowing that students bring to our classes? 

As I look forward to what my role might be or will be this year, I can still see a dichotomy. There will still be a constant balancing act. There will still be the pull between supporting staff and helping them while striving to find ways to feel supported myself.  To reconfigure the why and the how of the library space when the who and the what remain a mystery. To learn to roll with the ever-present threat of change, and not change in a good way where you learn and you grow, but change in the form of re-organized classrooms, staff abruptly shifted into new roles, the ever unknowing nature of future days.  

There will always be the struggle to remember to put my own mask on first. 

Maintaining Connection: September OneWordx12

 

It's almost back to school. We are now 4 days into September,

We've had three days of professional development here in my school board, plus one more next Tuesday before the students come back to the building. 

Many educators still don't know what grade or subjects they are teaching.

Many educators still don't know which physical classroom they will be in. Many educators don't know if they are going to be teaching virtually. There are so many things still unknown across the province as we head back to school.

I have been very lucky and blessed to learn that I will be remaining in the teacher-librarian role. While the physical space of the library learning commons in closed, I can still deliver books to classrooms. I can still do virtual story time. I can still co-teach using virtual tools. 

I can work to re-invent the teacher-librarian role and find ways to connect with the educators and learners in my building. And I'm hoping with the staff that will be working with students online as well.

My school is approximately 50% face to face and 50% online. This means 18 of our educators were moved from working in the physical building to teaching at the online school in my board.

That's a lot of educators that I won't see in the halls. I won't have a passing moment of connection when we discuss a moment from their class, someone asks a question about student, someone is looking for a book or resource to support their teaching. And when I reflect about the staff that will be in the building we will be so spread out as the classes are being placed in every other room, where possible, to maintain physical distancing in the halls. 

How might we actively work to maintain and 

build connections during this school year?

 

How will we lift each other up and be available to support each other when we are already feeling the stress of unknowns, the pandemic and life as we have known it for the last 6 months.

The world, and education, is starting to open it's eyes to the realities of racism, the harmful legacy of the colonial-settler history that has built our society, the ever-widening gaps in equity, resources and needs across our communities.

As we go back to school this year, I want to actively look at my role as the teacher-librarian and consistently be asking-

How can I work to create deep and meaningful connections with educators, students and their families?

Reflect. Review. Revise. A year in the Library Learning Commons

 

Last year (2018-2019) I was completing my Librarianship specialist at the end of the school year and one of our assignments what to create a year end report that could showcase the library learning commons to our stakeholders. Last year's report focused a lot on data that I was able to gather and collect to tell the story of our library space. 

You can see last year's report and the blog post I wrote about it here. 

Unfortunately, I didn't have access to a lot of the data this year 

since I was completing the report from home. 

I did, however, have the foresight to create an infographic for each month of the year starting back in September 2019. Now I didn't know the pandemic was coming... but I did want to be able to be reflective and proactive each month in regards to our library space and the use of the materials. 

My experience with collecting data and organizing it into monthly infographics 

was outlined in an article that I wrote for Teaching Librarian magazine. 

You can access that issue here. 

(Funny story, I was really excited about writing this article because even though I have written articles for other publications this was going to be my FIRST article that would be published on PAPER. And then, boom... pandemic. Teaching Librarian was published digitally. 

Sigh. Perhaps I'll be "in print" in the future.)

The year end report for the 2019-2020 school year has been split into two sections-

 September to March and April to June. 

Pre-pandemic. Post-pandemic. 

Traditional school.

Emergency distance learning. 

Face to face.

Virtual learning. 

I wanted to tell the story of our library space within the walls of the school and how we made the pivot to be able to support the learners within our community as learning shifted to an online environment.

We know the library learning commons model is more than than the space it physically occupies within a school. 

The LLC is a mindset. 

It is a belief system in the capabilities of our learners. 

It is the drive to push learning forward.

It is the love of books and literacy. In all forms.

It is a response to the needs of learners.

It is a safe space and a brave space.

And all of this has nothing to do with the walls and shelves and stuff within the space. 

My experience as a virtual Teacher Librarian involved a lot of tech support for educators as they shifted their practice and began to add skills related to technology and distance learning to their repertoire. While many educators had not attempted to use a Google Classroom or other online tools to interact and learn with their students previously, perhaps due to the age of their students... does a kindergarten student NEED to know how to login to an online learning environment? ... many educators grew their pedagogy related with online learning by leaps and bounds. 

They pushed out of their comfort zones and challenged themselves to try new things.

They sought out new tech tools that would allow them to connect with their students.

They were courageous in the face of an overwhelming pivot from the norm.

While the year end report tells the story of the library learning commons space, the learners and community of our school; it also tells the broader story of education and the experience of our emergency pivot to distance learning. 

My year end report can be found here and I'd love to discuss it with anyone that has questions or is interested. It was made in Canva and then uploaded to issuu to read like a magazine.

2019-2020 Larkspur Library Learning Commons 

Year End Report

Mindful and Connected

I really struggled to pick my word for August.

I'd been thinking of it leading up to August 1st by looking through list of words I've made and collected that might fit for different months or that speak to me and what I want to focus on in my life.

But then there was the ANNOUNCEMENT.

The education announcement. 

July 30th.

2020

Oh my, what a year this has been. 

I don't know about other parents and other parent-educators but I have ping-ponged back and forth between decisions about what to do with my young daughters come September countless times.

My sleeping schedule, routine, whatever you want to call it is all messed up.

I either can't fall asleep or I fall asleep fine and then I wake up a few hours later and 

am wide awake for a few hours in the night.

Then there's the unknowns about the library positions. Undoubtedly library spaces will be closed but will we be able to work out a modified book exchange system, internal curbside pickup? 

Will I be re-assigned to a classroom? Can I be re-assigned to a different school?

What about those who work in school libraries that are in contract positions?

Will school libraries become an easy budget line to ignore in the future?

How will children learn to read without books?

The questions! The questions! 

I've been seeing quite a few people on Twitter and other social media posting about focusing on their own self-care and looking for ways to help settle their nerves in the last few weeks. I think this is going to be extra important going into this school year, not only for ourselves as educators but in order to model it for our students to help them cope with the changes and stress this school year is going to bring.

I came across this tweet from Kimiko Shibata-

The attached google doc is full of great resources and links to help educators and those in their sphere find methods to help them self-regulate and be mindful of their emotions and stress.

Jenn Brown (@JennMacBrown) also posted about re-learning how to knit as a way to focus her energy into something that might help her to de-stress.

This all got my thinking about how I can use what remains of the summer break to focus on things that calm me, that remind me to take care of me and the littles in my care, that make me feel productive and happy. 

Conscious. 

My one word for August will be conscious. I want to remain conscious of how I am using my time. 

Am I using to fill my cup and feel good? Am I being mindful of taking care of myself and my body?

Am I aware of how I feel when watching the news, scrolling social media and interacting with others about the future plans of #OntEd?

I have started to keep a food journal and fitness/wellness log to track my daily walks. yoga and workouts. I am trying to cut back on dairy because we really don't get along when I eat too much. 

I am going to take up knitting again (it's been a few years) and attempt to make a square for the COVID 19 Memorial Blanket project. 

I want to be outside with the girls as much as possible.

Go for more hikes.

Read all the books. 

What might the LLC look like if/when we go back to school?

This has been the question on the mind of every school library professional since the start 

of the shut-down. At least, I know it has been on mine. 

The LLC is a space where students and educators come together to tinker, 

explore, play and of course READ. 

What happens when we need to stay apart for the safety of all? 

How might we re-imagine the methodology and pedagogy behind the LLC in order to bring the learning to the students, educators and their families? 

Jenn Brown and I facilitated an open discussion at the end of the school year with school library porfessionals across Ontario (and from BC!) discussing what the future might hold for our LLCs and the stakeholders we serve. 

You can listen to our debrief here as a podcast episode of Read Into This. We also looked over the notes taken during the discussion and the thoughts submitted from the participants in Google Form to come up with six "big" questions K-12 library questions in a pandemic world. 

These questions can be seen listed in Open Shelf. 

Of course my mind as been whirling and swirling all summer long. An educator's mind is never far from school and what might be...

A few thoughts I have had about how I might adapt my library program to move beyond the wall of the library space and into the classrooms of students....

BOOKS.

Most importantly, in my mind, is getting books into the hands of students. Each class can have a designated bin of books that is delivered on Monday and picked up the following Friday. The books can be kept in "quarantine" if needed after I pick them up before being distributed to other classes.

Pros: 

-students will have access to books in their class that they can read through out the week

-classes can put together request lists or topics of interest to help guide me in choosing books for their bin

Cons:

-students don't have access to the entire library collection and the self-regulation that comes with choosing their own reading materials in the space

-it will be time and labour intensive to choose and deliver bins of books to 30+ classrooms each week

INQUIRY. 

Last summer when we moved to Caledon East I was very excited to see inquiry style bags that had been curated for busy families. The idea being that families could choose a bag of 10 or so books to bring home without needing to spend time browsing and choosing. Also included in the bags were artifacts, games, and other items that connected with the books or might spark an inquiry at home.

Pros: 

-students love to explore and play with the tinkering stations spread through the library when they visit as part of our free flow routine, by creating this type of inquiry provocation in a bag or a bin student can continue to enjoy and explore within their classroom

-students may get an opportunity to explore a material they haven't previously explored or revisit an old fave

-the bins can be tailored to specific curriculum based inquiries that educators are exploring with their class (this can also help educators with their planning, grade level teams can co-plan with the teacher-librarian to create a set of bins related to the curriculum that can be shared among the classes (with proper disinfecting completed as needed))

Cons: 

-a lack of of free choice in materials to explore, students usually have free range of the library space

-do we have enough materials to spread out among the entire school population?

-completing the necessary disinfecting and tracking of materials to ensure equitable access

-once again time is a factor... 

MAKER. 

Cultivating a maker mindset and a maker culture within our school community has been a huge focus during my time as the teacher-librarian and I'd love for the momentum and passion for making that has been developed to continue to grow... even if we can't create together in the LLC space. I documented our journey and wrote a paper about it for Treasure Mountain Canada 2020. (You can access the paper and accompanying photo essay here.) (I also recorded my paper and was interviewed by Alanna King for the Read Into This podcast. The episodes can be found here and here.)

Once again.... bins, bags, boxes. 

Different maker provocations could be bundled up and delivered to classes. 

Perhaps each grade level could explore a different material? Perhaps it's just a box of materials and the invitation to create anything you can think of? Perhaps it's a guided maker project where the students can explore and learn a new skill? Perhaps it's a focus on the process of making and the creation must be deconstructed (like with loose parts) once the making has been completed and documented. 

Pros:

- students get to make stuff

(That's it... in my mind that's the best rationale there is. Students. Get. To. Make. Stuff. 

Cons:

-materials (budget? containers? disinfecting? amounts?)

-always time...

At this point, no one know what the fall might bring in terms of school or in terms of of school library learning commons but I'm hopeful that the magic of the library will still be there. Perhaps in a different form, perhaps in a better form? 

Time will tell.

Do you have an idea for how you might spread the magic of your school library program if/when we return to school? I'd love to hear about it. 

Forward.

Summer is finally here? Or is it?

It's hard to tell this year as we have been home since March. 

But the temperature is hotter and I'm getting less emails so it must be summer break.

I think many educators are feeling a little adrift this year as we settle into summer break. 

Doug Peterson highlighted this blog post by Lisa Corbett on This Week in Ontario EduBlogs. 

Lisa was writing about the last week of school but I think this description -

"I’m a ship lost at sea this week – meandering here and there with no real aim." 

- applies well to the first week of the summer. 

We haven't had any real routine here at my house. We are halfheartedly attempting to break the reliance on screens built from months of two adults attempting to work with two young children in the house. We are trying to get outside every day but it's HOT. We need to clean, tidy, organize and straighten all the makeshift works spaces and craft areas that have sprung up. 

But we haven't. Not really.

For the last two weeks I have taken part in the #QuarantineEd chat on Thursday night hosted by Matthew R. Morris and Jay Williams. Both discussions were open, honest and thought provoking. Last night's was interesting as the topic was supposed to center around summer plans but one participant asked an amazing question- 

"Do you think people will burn out or tire of anti-racist education?" 

(I'm paraphrasing and convinced their wording was better than mine. That was the gist.)

Wow. 

So many people shared honest concerns- that'll be worksheet-ified, that it will become something on a checklist to say we've covered it, that people won't see their place in the system and won't do the work, that people will find excuses not to do the work.

A big takeaway from last night for me was-

“You can only meet people as deeply as they have met themselves”

Which means as an educator it is my job to meet myself as deeply as possible. 

To look inwards, to reflect on my place of privilege, to consider my role in past wrongs, to unlearn and re-educate myself, to name and disrupt racism when and where it occurs in my sphere of influence. 

Doug also shared a blog post by Amanda Potts on This Week in Ontario EduBlogs and although I missed the broadcast of the show on Wednesday, reading the blog post really spoke to me. 

Is what I am doing enough? 

Is it enough to read and unlearn? Is it enough to listen and try to understand my role and to do better?

Is it enough to discuss my new learning with other educators and those is my life?

Is it enough to advocate for more books by Black and Indigenous authors for the library collection? To advocate for more diverse authors and illustrators that represent the tapestry of our world?

  To advocate for more books with diverse characters? 

I don't know.

I do know that I will keep reading, I will keep listening, 

I will keep discussing, I will keep learning, and I will keep advocating.

At first I thought picking my own word for July would be difficult given that

 I only picked June's word 13 days ago.

 I know that I originally posted that I might just keep unlearn for two months. 

But I want to be intentional in my own reflections and I want to stay committed to my goal of choosing one word each month for 2020.

Forward. 

July's word is connected to June's word... 

Unlearn. Forward.

As a white woman I recognize that my journey will be unending. 

I will be working every day to acknowledge what I don't know, 
to learn what I don't know, to de-centre myself, to do the WORK every day.

To learn forward. 

The Great Pause. Or the Push Forward.

So June.

Specifically June 19th.

Is it just me or do each of the months just get longer and longer this year?

2020. For real.

Back in January I decided to do one word for each month of the year based on what was happening, how I was feeling, and the goals I wanted to accomplish. Doug Peterson mentioned back in May that I just might be a genius (Well.... wink wink!). In all seriousness, if there was any year in which to do this, 2020 was definitely the year. 

And here we are in the 6th month of the year. Halfway done. 

But does it really feel like half? 

Or does it feel like an eternity. 

In truth I've had this blog post rolling around my brain for 19th days now. I knew going into June what my one word would be. I knew mostly want I wanted to say and to share.

So why did it take me 19 days to sit down and write it?

Because 2020. 

A look back at my OneWordx12 for this past year before we get to June's word(s) and why. 

January- Renew

February- Motion

March- Appreciate

April- Breathe

May- Grace

It's an interesting progression of words. Discussing it might be a whole other blog post.

Back at the end of May I heard a colleague say that in a meeting they had someone in yet a different meting describe this time as "the great pause". 

That we'd all look back and see the time as when we stood still. 

When we took a pause. 

When we had time to spare.

And while I can see certain aspects of that, I'm not driving my kids around to activities, we aren't rushing home from school to eat dinner and head out again, we aren't making weekend plans just to wish we'd stayed home and relaxed, etc, there's so much more to this that is not a pause.

Of course, I must acknowledge the wide path of privilege I have walked in during this time. 

Both my husband and I are still fully employed and getting our full paycheques. We have fully functioning wifi (for the most part). Our children have devices on which they can learn or entertain themselves. No one in my family is sick, got sick, or was hospitalized. We own A LOT of books. We are not food insecure.

But I don't see this as a pause at all. If anything this has been a huge push forward. 

When I think of the learning gains undertaken by educators and support staff across the world to pivot to emergency distance learning and completely change the way in which we deliver the education system as never before. 

That is not a pause.

Considering the duality of the roles taken on by many parents and caregivers to not only do their own work and see to their own responsibilities but to become homeschool parents to multiple ages and grades of children when in most cases they hadn't taken part in an education setting since their own days in school 20 or more years ago. 

That is not a pause.

The door, the lock, the unspoken knowledge of the wide gap in equality of education, food security, wage inequality, home life, access to health care, and systemic racism was blown wide open during this time. Never again will people be able to say "I didn't know." 

If you don't know after this, it's because you don't want to know. 

This was not a great pause for many people.

This was stress. This was heartache. This was illness and death. This was wondering which bill to pay and which meal to eat. This was continuing to see how society treated you differently because of the colour of your skin. 

Inequality did not pause for COVID 19.

Food insecurities did not pause for COVID 19.

Racism did not pause for COVID 19. 

I hope this is the push forward.

I hope this is the point from which we unlearn. From which re-educate ourselves.

And that is my commitment. My word for June is unlearn. 

To confront my place in the truth of anti-Black racism and 

white supremacist structures here in Canada. 

To acknowledge my role and responsibility to 

understand the settler-colonizer history of this land that is now called Canada. 

To work to learn and take action to support the communities that live with the 

trauma of this daily oppression  and marginalization.

Given the importance and necessity of this work I think 

I will keep this word or choose a variation of the idea. 

This work will take a lifetime.

Moving Forward With Grace

https://bayart.org/grace-quotes/

Each month of this year I have been choosing a new ONE WORD. Instead of one word to try and fit the whole year, I wanted to be constantly reflecting on where I am and where I am going.

And who knew back in January when I started this that 2020 would be the year that each month would require it's own word.

Seriously. Each month of the year has actually required a word.

It's only been 4 months. 4 months.

Wow.

Listening to educators and parents express their frustration and stress over the emergency distance prompted me to share the following on my personal FaceBook page. And in writing it I determined my word for May.

Grace.

Teachers are doing their very best with what amounts to emergency distance learning.

This is not e-learning, this is not planned, this is not normal.

Good pedagogy involves establishing a relationship with your students, talking with them, observing them work, observing them struggle, observing them master a skill.

Almost none of these things can be done through a screen.

Teachers are trying their very best. In many cases they have learned more new things in the past 4-6 weeks than many of us who have dedicated time to innovating and trying new tech have in years.

Will some activities take too long? Yes.

Will some activities need a lot of adult help? Yes.

Will some activities be too short or too easy? Yes.

Will it involve YouTube videos? Clicking many links? Downloading docs and slides and PDFs and jpgs and and and? Yes.

Is it learning? Maybe.

Some families are demanding teachers send more work. Some are complaining to their friends that it’s too much. Some are complaining loudly and to whoever will listen that we don’t deserve to be paid.

And I believe that all of those parents are overwhelmed, scared, stressed and worried.

I also believe that most teachers are working longer hours and feel that they aren’t making any difference. They know this is the best learning situation for your children... for their students.

They know.

There is still no end in sight to this.

So as we move into May and end another week of emergency distance learning let’s all live with a little grace.

Give yourself and your children permission to not do the work for a day, or two... or a week. It’s ok.

Give yourself grace to recognize that you can’t do your job and teach your kids at home.
We get it. We can’t do it either.

Give your children grace and time to read, time to play games and time to laugh. They will still learn.

If we get through this with happy and healthy children, we win.

If we get through this with children who have learned the value of standing strong with their community, we win.

If we get through this with children who have learned cooking and laundry and cleaning and other life skills, we win.

Wake up tomorrow and give yourself grace.

https://me.me/i/it-takes-grace-to-remain-kind-in-cruel-situations-daily-18523691